Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Key Words I Learned REALLY Fast...

When we first got married, I realized that it was going to be very interesting to say the least for two very different people to really become "one"! There were so many things we had different opinions on, and my husband and I are both VERY STRONG personalities.

There were several key phrases I learned that helped me through this time. I practiced them over and over again in my mind until they spilled out every time I needed them.

Lay it down
Let it go
Give it up
Forget about it

As issues were discussed, opinions were exchanged, concessions were mandatory, and as I felt I had to "give up" just about everything I was used to, I just kept on saying: "lay it down, Karen, let it go, give it up! - forget about it!" Over and over again, those decisions carried me through years of self-sacrifice for the better of our marriage.

I loved one line in The Family Man movie: Nicholas Cage decides he wants to give up a home in the country to move to the city. Tia Leone is incredulous, because they had planned on staying in the country. I love when in exasperation Tia Leone throws up her hands and says "OK Jack, OK -- I choose YOU."

So many times, when we "lay it down, let it go, give it up, and forget about it," what we are actually doing is "choosing YOU" to our spouse. Submitting in love to the other person. Sacrificially laying down our own desires for someone else.

To me the most amazing thing about love is when we truly LOVE someone enough to die to our own self for them. It makes me feel so God-empowered when I truly love my husband so sacrificially and without demanding anything in return. These are some of the characteristics of that kind of love:

1Corinthians 13:4-8 Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies.

Challenge: Don't concern yourself so much about being LOVED as in LOVING!
Don't concern yourself so much about being LOVED as in being LOVEABLE!
And when the need arises (don't worry, it will soon!), lay it down, let it go, give it up and forget about it! And look over the verses above and see where you need to work on loving, and start there!

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