Monday, December 8, 2008

Share the Love!

When you get married, there are SO MANY people you have loved for SO MANY years whom your new spouse has just recently met.  Even if your spouse has been around for several years, he hasn't known your siblings since birth, nor your parents, nor your family, nor your eccentric Aunt Whomever with all her quirks (and perks!).  

It is going to take quite awhile for your average 25-year old spouse to live with your most-loved relatives and friends long enough to share as many memories as you.   You need to make it easier for your spouse to love the people you love.  Here's some tips on how to make it even easier:

*Share some of the amazing things you love them for.  Share some of their personality and character gifts they have shared with your family or friends over the years.

*Do NOT SHARE every little frustration you have with your brother/sister/mother/father.  If you expect your spouse to jump in and understand someone's quirks and idiosyncrasies and be able to look over them like YOU do because you have 25-some years of MUSHY CUTSIE WONDERFUL STUFF to balance it all out, forget it.  You will pollute and poison your spouse from loving your family like you do if you share little nit-picky things with them.

*Include your family and friends in your life.  Visit them.  Talk about them.  Call them (you can even set a timer for 5 or 10 minutes -- just pick up the phone to say HI!).  Send a note here and there.  Let them see how important your family is to you!

*Have family movie night occasionally where you look at past movies and talk about your family and why it is so special.

Challenge:  Don't pollute your spouse's mind about your family and friends!  Share the good things about the people you love, and help your spouse to love them more and more and more!